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Life With ADD/ADHD - Online Support Group

My History

I am a 62 year old male and never officially been diagnosed with ADHD. My parents were divorced when I was 6 and always had bad report marks with no one picking this up. I went through school and years of a variety of different employments. I excelled in sports from my school days and achieved high status in playing football for my country. It was only 3-4 weeks ago that ADHD was put in front of me by my 3rd wife because she does remedial teaching with AudiBloks to grade ones. As if a lightning bolt had hit me and I cried for days. Every failure in my life had these symptoms and was the result of where I am today. I don't believe in doctors. I had eczema problem for 35 years with every homeopathic testing and thousands of Rands spent on every cream and ointment known to man. It was the chlorine in the water!!! I don't know if, at my age, there is medication that I would want to start testing all over again. I am still very hyperactive with my attention deficit very much active and have come to deal with it as it happens. That's all for now

Gerald, you're the same age that I am, and I can relate to what you are saying. (I don't have ADHD, though -- I work for Ben's Friends as a resource person for moderators.) I say that I can relate, because when I look back on my school days, which were in the same era as yours, I can think of many classmates who were troublesome, and I have since come to realize that many of them probably had ADHD. Their school lives were hard, and filled with conflict of various kinds. A shame, really, and some of them were clearly very smart too. But in those days, there simply was no such diagnosis, nor was there the help there is nowadays to support students with these tendencies. Our contemporaries usually just didn't -- or more correctly, couldn't -- do well in school, the way school was structured in those days. In adulthood, they often developed their own strategies, as you have, for dealing with the unidentified problem.

This is a good place to come for support and suggestions. It's a friendly place, and I'm sure the people here will be able to give you some direction and support to make your life a bit easier. I'm glad that you found us, even if it is a shame that you had reason to come looking!

Thanks for the respond, I appreciate talking to someone in this "field". I think...know I was one of those whom struggled at school. I never met deadlines because I forgot the importance for getting my homework/tasks in on time. Those years our principal had permission to hand out corporal punishment. My backside used to burn on a few occasions. I never could get to "studying" for exams. I would try and answer a few of my own questions of the work I had just done without success. I was not a troublesome boy. I never caused trouble or stole or fight or was on drugs or alcohol. I loved playing sport rather than studying. At work I would get board with my work and would get transferred to lower ranks where more physical work was involved. I could not memorise my tasks to complete them. I was "stupid" in those days. As I sit here now at 3am, I have 3 quotations that must go out to clients that I can just not get into to complete. Are my symptoms close to ADHD? Without going to a clinical sycologist, do I at least qualify for something? I am in tears again!!!!!

Gerald, I’m a retired teacher, so I’ve seen and dealt with many students with ADHD, but I really don’t have anything like the first-hand experience that the people here do. It’s a wonderful group, and I’m sure they will reach out to you.
Besides a lack of concentration, what else do you struggle from?

Gerald, being diagnosed late in life we have developed empathy for others, too. Recognizing yourself in a list of symptoms is a shock at first. If it brings you sadness, you can find a way to lift yourself up. Today I learned from another member about making a Good Day journal, where she writes about what she feels good about or what she was able to enjoy on a particular day. It was good for her because she has a few health problems, so reading about what she liked about her good days were inspirational memories rather than discouraging ones.

You are made up of more than a list of symptoms, and you are amazing in many ways. If you decide to see a psychologist for a diagnosis a good one will support you in your journey and will recognize your experience in life as a great gift. That's the best thing about being older - we're wiser, too. Welcome to the group!